Sadness, my companion. Tears, my bff. As i write this, my writing pad is stained with tears. My heart hurts, my throat is constricted and my breath catches every second. I think i’m having minor heart attack. My vision is blurry and my mind foggy. Why am i sad you ask you might ask? I’m in the process of making some life changing decisions and also having mind twisting situations thrown my way.
Today i have no topic nor witty theme to talk about and since i have a goal of writing at least once a week, i decided to come on here and just pour out my heart. No finesse, ‘razzmatazzy’ style of writing, no riveting play of words.
What do you do when you can’t sleep? not from lack of trying but from an intense and sharp pain brought on by thoughts words cannot even begin to describe. What do you do when you are surrounded by tons of people yet you could not be any more lonely 😦
Think i might just say today’s theme is grief, then i could give it my own definition as ‘the loss of someone/something one cherishes and the gut wrenching, stomach churning, world spinning, heart stopping feeling that comes with said loss’. We could also say today’s topic is loss; Lost love, Lost dreams, Lost vision, Lost opportunities, Lost dignity….
We could also give today’s post another title; Pain. Physical pain, emotional pain, spiritual pain etc. Writing helps, I’m also gonna talk to my Father, He knows my heart, He knows my mind. He know what i want, need and what’ll make me happy 😀
Music also helps, it soothes me and like crack makes me forget 🙂 i just had to say that (crack bit) to reassure y’all(concerned quirkies) that the quirkyone is still here, draped in a garment of despair and sadness but here still 🙂 So i leave y’all with this song from a great icon God rest her soul, Whitney Houston.
I do apologize if this rubs anybody the wrong way but i just needed to do this 🙂 Remember to smile to someone, hug your loved ones and be happy you have them, do not take anyone for granted! Remember to pray for grace for me whenever you whisper a prayer for yourselves. Love y’all and talk to you soon 🙂