2016; Life lessons learnt


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2016 was one of the hardest years of my life as an adult. I started writing this list a couple of months into 2016, so whenever I experienced something personally or made observations from daily human interactions, I would scribble them now. So as much as this is a list of things learnt from personal experiences, it is also about what life and other people have taught me.

So here we go; my list of life lessons learnt in 2016.


You have to hustle hard for yourself. People are important but your goals and plans should take precedent, no feelings or mgbeke love should influence your actions.

People who you think are your true friends will stab you in the back and front without remorse.

Death is a shitty thing to deal with no matter how old you become. It will make you question EVERYTHING!

No matter how much you may think you fit with another person, no matter how much your future with them seems clear and perfect, until they see and acknowledge it, you’re just toying with a broken, “smashed to powder and blown away”heart.

Depression is real and anxiety is realer. Accepting that you have it or are struggling with mental health issues is even harder.

Friends that can drop everything and be there for you are a rare gift that should not be taken for granted. True friendship doesn’t understand constrains be it time, distance, money etc. They will show up and out at the drop of a hat!

Giving people as many chances as possible doesn’t mean you’re a softie.

No one can understand what you’re going through until you open your mouth and speak. Perception and intuition is great but nothing beats a simple and honest conversation.

Loving someone can be a tedious task and letting go a harder one.

Friends with benefits(FWB) is a myth! Someone always catches feelings and it’s usually the person who vehemently upholds its motto and core values, the way the said person will catch these feelings will even amaze them!

One of the best things in life is the smile that lights up someone’s face when you give them a genuine and heartfelt compliment.

I am HIV free! This is something I didn’t really give any thought to until I visited TIERS office and had it done again. Guys HIV/AIDS is real, make sure you get tested.

No one is a perfect fit for you, you choose them and then make a determined decision to daily love them.

A baby’s laughter is sweet melody for the soul.

Resentment is a deadly disease that chips at your happiness one thought at a time and if not acknowledged and controlled, you might not recognise yourself after its done with you.

Do not be quick to stick a label on a relationship, find out what you are looking for and ensure that the relationship aligns with your goals.

People will let you down so hard that all you can do is sigh, pick up your jaw off the floor and move on with life.

Tell people how you feel about them, your  words might be the needed anchor on a very stormy day. Most importantly, back your words with actions

People will do and say anything to get ahead, learn to sell yourself.

People believe in you and your goals much more than you can imagine, go out and get started.

Mutual respect and understanding are vital for any relationship to thrive.

Human beings are prone to fakery, be honest and fair in your dealings, be genuine in your interactions, it’s a refreshing quality.

No one owes you anything, I repeat, NO ONE OWES YOU ANYTHING!

Money answereth all things(okay the Bible taught me this but this year hammered it in)

God is a God of supply.

A good cry at the right time is therapeutic. Just let go and feel the pain ease a little.

The church has failed its people. The church here is you,me, all of us. We have failed to stand up for the things that matter.

True friends are those who ignore your weirdness and love you in their own unique ways.

Miracles happen!!!!!

Being angry at God is not as rare as we christians like to assume.

Some men are scum! Search “men are scum” hashtag on Twitter and be informed.

Loving someone shouldn’t be hard, it shouldn’t break you down, it shouldn’t make you question the essence of who you are.

Life is hard and sometimes it’s okay to just stay down for a bit. No strategising, no recouping, just a blatant acceptance of the state of things.

Respecting yourself is a vital key to empowerment.

Your dad is your dad, your mother’s husband is your mother’s husband. Never mix the two up as a child and your life will be much easier.

Loving God is hard.

Simplicity can never go wrong! Living a simple, honest life frees you up.

The word of God you know sometimes doesn’t give you comfort and it’s okay to feel that way.

A lot of people have become so wrapped up in pretence that they do not know how to come out of it.

Fear is a powerful tool that people do not really get, it cripples you, it also manifests in ways unimaginable.

Twerking is not as easy as it looks.


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Happy New Year Quirkies!!!!!!! 2016 was one kain(meaning some type of way)I couldn’t wait for it to end but I was also dreading the new year because I didn’t want the things happening in 2016 to spill over, but we are here, alive and somewhat well.

I don’t have the enthusiasm and newness attached to a new year and it’s hard explaining it to people so I try to smile and mumble when someone asks what the plans for the year are. It’s hard explaining why you’re having multiple panic attacks when it’s just the 4th day of the year, why you’re frozen with anxiety at the thought of embarking on this road called 2017.

However, in the face of all these mixed feelings, I have chosen to “do!” this year. Do as much as I can volunteering, collaborating, putting more of myself out there(sometimes I wonder what this “there” is sef)

In 2017, even in the face of uncertainty, depression, anxiety, I Timiebi have made a pledge to do! Do and be as much as I can until I am spent, recuperate and do some more.

So if you have any projects and are looking for volunteers, collaborators, freelancers anything and you think I can help or even if you don’t, reach out to me and let’s just do this!

That’s it quirkies! I pray that 2017 will be kind to you, you will experience exponential growth in all areas of your life. Don’t let fear get the best of you, cry if you need to, laugh until your sides hurt and do as much as you can for your community but most importantly for yourself.

We’ll resume our weekly series on Friday with #QuirkyFridays where I’ll be letting myself bare and hoping it helps someone.

Talk to y’all later xxxx

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